So here is something you need to try to imagine:
D. and I do our best to "tag team" a lot of diaper changes. Isaiah is stronger than you might imagine a 26-pound person to be. He is pretty buff. He doesn't like having his diaper changed, probably because he's been traumatized by having saline squirted up his nose in order to help with congestion. So we have a diaper-changing strategy.
We sing one of several songs, the choices include "The Itsy Bitsy Spider," "The Wheels on the Bus," and "The Alphabet Song." If you'd like to suggest another choice, be sure to add a comment. In an attempt to add variety, D. has been known to sing the words to "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" to the tune of "I Need a Lover Who Won't Drive Me Crazy" by John Cougar Mellencamp. It's actually pretty catchy.
Before we take him in his room, one of us begins singing one of the songs listed above. The singing must involve a lot of enthusiasm and fervent motions. The designated singer must sing whole-heartedly and keep Isaiah's attention while the other one opens the wipes container, gets down to the diaper and cleans up Isaiah's bottom as quickly and efficiently as possible all while joining in on the song. Of course, the designated diaper-changer isn't expected to participate in motions.
The hardest part may be putting the clean diaper on him, because by this time he has gotten tired of listening to the song and laughing at the motions. Forget about snapping a onesie! Whoever thought it was a good idea to make a pair of jeans with about 40 snaps up the legs?
Wouldn't you like to be a fly on the wall? I bet we could make a lot of money off a reality show. I'm thinking TLC because we're way too classy for a network reality show. Especially Fox.
